Tuesday, January 18, 2022

5 Steps to Combat the Comparison Trap

In today’s society, it’s common to try to one-up people, whether it’s with material things or with accomplishments. And to do this, we often compare ourselves to others. But this can do more damage than good. Let’s take a look.


Thomas Mussweiler, a professor of organizational behavior, says, “We’re wired for connection and belonging, but if we constantly compare ourselves to others, we’re putting our happiness, confidence, and mental health at risk.”


Our minds are conditioned to compare ourselves to others, so we know where we stand—if we are good at certain things or not. But when this act of comparing becomes the norm in every area of our lives, our mental health can suffer.


Are you guilty of the comparison game? If so, here are five things you can do to help.


5 Ways to Beat Comparison


1. Embrace Gratitude


Be thankful for what you have.


Write a list or meditate on why you are happy in life. This helps us shift our thinking to positive things rather than looking at what others have that we don’t.


Think about non-material things here as well. It’s great to be thankful for a house and car, but don’t forget those around you, too.


2. Set Goals for Yourself


Without comparing yourself to others, set healthful goals that will benefit you in the long run.


Maybe you want to exercise for the health of it (rather than to be smaller than your best friend). Or perhaps you want to read more books this year than you did last year. Maybe you want to earn a degree to broaden your horizons. Or perhaps you want to travel with your loved one so you can share more experiences with them (versus trying to have better FaceBook pics.)


Setting goals is great if you do it with the right focus.


3. Celebrate You


Start a real list of what you like about yourself.


Be careful not to make it sound like a resume. Be real. What are some things you do that you are proud to do? Are you a good baker? Are you good at cheering people up? Are you a giver? Are you creative? Be proud of who you are. 


Being humble doesn’t mean beating yourself up.


4. Praise Others


When you have good friends and family and even coworkers, it’s time to praise them.


It’s a great way to feel good about yourself while you do this. Lifting others up is good for the soul… even the person who is giving the praise.


5. Take a Break from Social Media


When we constantly look at others’ social media posts, it seems like their lives are perfect.


Well, we all know that’s not the truth.


These are only snips of things going on. We never know the whole story. So, why should we put pressure on ourselves to do the same things? We sometimes need a break from social posts to refresh our minds and help ourselves to focus on what really matters in life.


There are so many tempting ways we try to compare ourselves in life. But if we can remember to retrain our brains from comparing ourselves with others, we will be much happier.


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